To say this holiday season is a busy one, would be an understatement. I'm swamped, but in the best way possible. I'm finishing up current projects, trying to find the time to enjoy the festivities of the season, while still planning some even bigger upcoming projects. This past week, I've been chatting with a few other creative entrepreneurs and they seem to all be in the same place. Ambitious, overwhelmed, excited to plan for the new year, but stuck. So I'm interrupting your regularly scheduled holiday programming to just chime in and "preach" for a minute. I'm hoping that maybe this rant will help you overcome one of your biggest barriers.
Success doesn't come easy, but here's a little secret...
I've had numerous personal and business breakthroughs over the past ten years of writing this blog and of the past twenty years of working for myself. But, 2018 is about to be the most successful year I've ever had, and let me tell you why.
Confidence.
If you don't believe in yourself, no one else will.
You are your best salesman, even if you aren't good at selling.
I'm great at selling someone else or someone else's product, because I'm passionate about it. So why was I not passionate about myself? (ahhh... lightbulb!) Yep. Once that aha moment kicks in, you will never be the same again.
You know this thing that people say...
"Don't take it personal, it's business."
...well I say,
"Bullshit."
I am my business and I do take it personal. My business is me. I'm not selling a handbag I've designed (well not yet at least) or tube of lipstick, I'm selling me. So when I didn't land that client or big project, you best your ass I've taken it personal. I can almost guarantee you that most of the time though, it's not you, it's them. The timing could be off, they can't afford you, etc. Whatever reason why it didn't work out, or they didn't buy your product or your service, I can almost promise you it has nothing to do with you as a human being.
This is not an easy pill to swallow and I still struggle with it from time to time. When you are your own brand, there's a fine line between you being the brand and the brand being you, and that fine line usually comes down to money.
Speaking of money...
"Knowing your worth is necessary in building your confidence."
If you don't truly believe that you deserve money and success, then you will never achieve it.
Don't get caught up in comparing yourself to others. Been there, done that. The time and energy you waste on comparing yourself to others only takes away from your own goals. We all are on our own special journey and we just need to stay in our own lane. Focus on you. Whatever has been blocking you from success, figure it out, work on it and move past it.
We all have those people that we look to and compare ourselves to. You know the ones. They have the job we want, the money we want, the wardrobe and the life we are striving to achieve. Guess what they don't have? They aren't you.
Embrace your talents and really understand your value. It's great to look at others being successful, because that just drives you to do more and achieve more, but when you put those people up on a pedestal, you are just giving away your energy. The only person you should be giving energy to, is you.
After twenty years of hustling, creating, learning, teaching, succeeding, failing and getting up again, the one thing that changed me, was accepting that I had lost my authenticity along the way. In those moments of fear when I was falling, failing and filling myself with self-doubt, I lost who I really was. I kept trying to fit into the mold that I thought people wanted. I lost myself in chasing success so much that I forgot my authentic self. I forgot my passions and the weird, little things that make me, me. That one thing that sets me apart from you and everyone else.
In that moment, (or perhaps I should say several months of on-going personal growth) when I finally realized that not being my authentic self being me was the one thing that had prevented me from achieving the success I was after, everything changed.
Confidence isn't something you gain overnight. It's not something that can be taught from a book. It has to come from within. Once you understand where and why you are lacking any ounce of confidence in who you are or what you are trying to "sell", watch the magic unfold and the success pour in.
Don't mistake confidence for arrogance. There is a perfect balance between knowing who you are and what you're worth and thinking you just deserve success because you are you. You have to put the work in. You have to look at yourself with a microscope and be willing to admit your faults. Leave your ego at the door.
Your ego is only fear. Fear that you won't succeed, fear that people won't like you or fear that you aren't good enough. When you are really ready for success and pure happiness, your confidence will kick in and you will suddenly realize that you will succeed and people already love you because you aren't just good enough, but because you're pretty incredible.
photo credit: wildfox
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